Sunday, January 24, 2010

Wrapped up into one beautiful package...

The lights were bright, my chest was numb. I felt like I couldn't breathe. It was the most vulnerable feeling I have ever had. Yet all I could do was lay there and wait. Everything was loud, people talking, machines beeping, and the sound of my own breath while I gasped for air seemed to consume me. I tried to yell but I couldn't get enough air to make any noise. All I could say was "I'm not breathing".
"Your breathing hunny. If you weren't breathing u wouldn't be able to talk".
"Will you stay with me and talk to me please?" I begged the soothing voice.
"Ill stay right here" she said.
That was all I remember minutes before I saw him. I awaited his arrival for what seemed like forever and the closer I came to seeing him the more time seemed to stand still. But he was here. Finally. He had a beautiful olive complexion with eyes so dark you would have thought were blue. His cheeks were rosy and supple. His long thick hair was black, lacking any type of curl but still so soft. The sound of his voice was unlike any I heard before. His existence changed my life forever and I only had to glance once.
From that moment on my life changed. The clouds rolled out and the sun shined through. It was unlike anything I expected. Everything you could ever want was wrapped up into one beautiful package. And he was mine. God sent him to me, from Heaven with a purpose. I'm certain of that.
I reached out my hand and touched his cheek. "He is beautiful" I said with tears streaming down my face. When I held him in my arms he looked at my eyes but it felt as if he saw my soul. He knew instantly of his mother's unconditional love. A love I always knew, but had no idea I desperately needed to provide. At that point, we both needed each other. We grew together. I healed, he blossomed. He unknowingly sought out the best in me and I poured every part of myself into my love for him. He prepared me for the next chapter of my life. As far as I was concerned it couldn't get any better than it was. The sky was as blue as ever, the grass greener. Everything was so vivid and full of life. I was as happy as ever thinking I had everything I ever needed. But there was a bigger plan for us...

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